Guest Blogger Virginia: Children’s Community School: Where Kids Learn To Get Ahead By Getting Along

When it was time to begin the private elementary school application process for my daughter, I knew what I didn’t want. 

I didn’t want a traditional, ultra-elitist private elementary school environment, the kind that my son had been struggling in for four years. The school that he attended was, and still is, a favorite destination for Hollywood parents paying for a pipeline into top-echelon secondary schools. I refer to this institution as “The Stepford School,” because all the parents and teachers wore the same vacant expression, the same shellacked-on smile, and repeated the same parenting sound bytes spooned to them during parent education meetings moderated by the Napoleonic School Director.  To bastardize George Orwell, this Director believed in treating the celebrity parents more equally than others. The trickle-down effect on the kids was alarming: the school was churning out well-groomed automatons unable to think for themselves and anxiously monitoring their ever-shifting spot on the social pecking order. 

At the same time that my son was not thriving at “Stepford,” my daughter “Katherine” was flourishing at All Children Great and Small, a progressive preschool that operates out of a funky Craftsman bungalow in Los Feliz. In keeping with the progressive education philosophy, “Katherine” didn’t learn much about letters and numbers at preschool, but she learned how to work and play well with others.

Whenever I went to All Children, whether to pick up my daughter, or participate in School Clean-Up day, I noticed that my cares evaporated when I walked through the door, and I just felt happy. When I looked around at the teachers, the kids, and the other parents, I saw that they looked happy too. And they actually enjoyed talking to each other! This could not have been further from my experience stepping onto the pristine grounds of “Stepford,” where the tacit message behind every clenched jaw and unfurrowed Botoxed forehead was: “How-much-do-I-need-to-donate-to-the-Annual-Fund-to-get-my-kid-into-Harvard-Westlake?” At “Stepford,” community events consisted more of jockeying for position than in truly working together towards a common goal.

So when I began elementary school tours in the fall of ’06, I looked for one thing: a community of people who seemed happy and well-adjusted. I looked for a community in which middle-class people were treated the same as rich people.  Where teachers had their own voice instead of serving as the Director’s puppets. Where everyone–kids, teachers, and parents–felt that they had something of value to contribute.

I encountered this ambience of authentic, democratic community the moment I walked through the gate of Children’s Community School (CCS). Located in Van Nuys on a pleasant but decidedly non-bells-and-whistles campus, CCS has been providing a progressive K-6 education for over 30 years. Founded by current Director Neal Wrightson and Leni Jacksen, CCS attracts a diverse population. Almost 40% of the student body receives financial aid. As one CCS mom puts it in her tongue-in-cheek yet apt way, “CCS is where rich people go so they don’t have to act like rich people.”

Of all the elementary schools to which we applied, the CCS application process was the sanest. I attended a parent-led tour ending with a conversation facilitated by Wrightson. Then a staff member from CCS visited “Katherine’s” preschool to observe her in her familiar school setting—the opposite approach of most other schools, which put 5-year-olds in the stressful position of going into a new environment, being separated from their parents, and taking tests. There was no parent interview required. The CCS application form was brief. I noted two CCS parents who knew our family and who could act as referrals. And that was that.

During the conversation on the parent tour, Wrightson answered nervous parents’ questions about the school’s policy on homework, conflict resolution and students’ transitions into secondary schools. One comment he made, in response to a query about what CCS offered to give kids a competitive edge, struck me as profoundly commonsensical. He explained that none of us knows what the best job markets will be in 20 years, so the school doesn’t teach to that. What CCS does do, however, is teach kids how to be part of a community. When kids learn how to contribute meaningfully to a group, how to listen to others, partner with others, and motivate others, they will be successful regardless of what profession they choose to go into.

Now that “Katherine” is entering her 4th grade year at CCS, I reflect on Wrightson’s comment often. While I have no clue what field she might go into one day, I know this: she’s good at working with others and she’s someone other kids want to work with. She’s able walk into a group of people she doesn’t know, strike up a conversation, make a friend, join in any activity. In CCS group projects (most of the learning is group-based) she knows both her roles and the roles of her peers. She has a voice and an ear; she can communicate her ideas and she can listen. 

What she has gleaned more than anything is a sense that she is personally invested in her learning process. It is not something forced upon her, but something she feels responsible to own. She has a healthy pride and self-agency that comes both from being part of a community and feeling valued in that community.

Four years after starting that elementary school application process, I realize I found what I wanted: a place where kids learn how to belong and are taught that everyone deserves respect, regardless of the label on their pocketbook.

For More Information About Children’s Community School, visit,

For More Information About All Children Great And Small Preschool, visit,

Virginia Gilbert is a licensed marriage and family therapist living in Los Angeles. She is also a writer whose articles have appeared in Salon, the Los Angeles Times, and, to name a few. Together, her two children have attended three preschools, two elementary schools, and two middle schools in the L.A. area. 

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Christina Simon: Los Angeles, California, United States I'm the mom of two kids who attended The Willows School in Culver City and Viewpoint School in Calabasas. My daughter is a graduate of Northwestern University Medill School of Journalism ('23) and my son is a sophomore at UPenn/Wharton ('26). I live in Coldwater Canyon with my husband, Barry, and our dogs. Contact me at

10 thoughts to “Guest Blogger Virginia: Children’s Community School: Where Kids Learn To Get Ahead By Getting Along”

  1. Thank you for this piece about CCS. I emailed it to a friend who is planning to tour the school in the fall.

  2. Great post – thank you! It's so nice to read about a unique, progressive school as opposed to one of the top three feeders to Harvard-Westlake.

  3. This blog is one of the only places where I can find information about progressive and traditional schools. This piece is so helpful. We live in the Valley and we're just not sure whether we want a traditional school or not. We're not even sure if we want public or private. Thanks for this blog post.

  4. Thanks for the interesting post. This school sounds great. But if it's really that democratic, why of all questions to ask on their simple application form, do they ask if you have any connections to the school. That is the one part that seems inconsistent (undemocratic, if you will) about the school. Does it hurt if you don't know anyone there?

  5. I don't think it's "who you know" in the sense of do you know anyone "important"…it's more just getting a reference. Really the same kind of thing as employers ask for. But it's certainly not a deal breaker if you don't know anyone at CCS–don't let that stop you from applying.

  6. we are considering touring CCS. it seems to foster a love for learning & has a unique approach (no tests, no textbooks, no grades!). but since it isn't traditional, i've heard it attracts a disproportionate number of "non-traditional learners," ie, kids who may not be able to sit still or focus or do well in other schools. is this true? if so, does that mean it may not be a good fit for our child who appears to enjoy a structured environment? thank you for your blog and helpful insight!

  7. I'm not sure that I'm qualified to weigh in on whether or not CCS is the right school for your child. Your thoughts about structure are important, however. I think it's worth you touring CCS and addressing the structure issue with Neil Wrightson.

  8. We went to CCS for a few years and left for that very reason. There is a disproportionate number of kids who have some sort of social or learning issue. It's great that they have found a school that is willing to work with them individually, but we found that it did have a significant impact on what they were able to do in the class. Each year we seemed to loose a large number of the kids that wanted to do more to other schools and they would be replaced with more kids that left other schools for obvious reasons.

  9. Thank you for sharing your experience, Anon poster of Aug 28! It's very helpful and something we will seriously consider.

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