Guest Blogger Isla: What Do You Do When Your "Perfect" Child Has Difficulty Achieving In School?

Park Century School, Culver City

At the age of 5, our daughter was eloquent, precocious, and seemed to have a photographic–like memory. My husband and I were in absolute awe and assumed, when she hit kindergarten, that she would be at the top of her class.  But she wasn’t.

 

From the moment that I entered the room at our first parent/teacher conference, I knew something was wrong.  Her teachers sat with uncomfortable smiles and explained that she was not meeting expectations in reading, writing, and math.  Looking back, she did exhibit difficulties learning the alphabet and sight words.  Homework seemed to take more and more time.  Her teachers suggested that, perhaps, it was just a developmental thing.  Most people “redshirt” in the community where we live, and she was one of the youngest in her class. By first grade, however, she still had not caught up to speed, despite outside tutoring.  We knew something was wrong.

 

We requested that the school test her for a learning disability.  However, she was still making progress and had not fallen far enough behind for the administration to recommend testing.  After reading several books on learning disabilities, I realized that we had no time to waste.  My husband and I took her for private testing, and a reading disorder was diagnosed.

 

We agonized over whether to try and work with the public school system and advocate for an individualized education plan.  After consultation with an educational specialist, we decided that the quickest way to get our daughter back on track was to move to an independent school that could teach bright kids with learning differences. Now she is in a diverse, multi-sensorial environment, Park Century School (PCS) that educates children, grades 2-8. She gets one-on-one reading and math and is soaring above grade level. Children in her school come from John Thomas Dye, Curtis School, The Willows, Wildwood and more. All are unbelievably creative, smart kids that happen to learn differently.

 

Parents at PCS all have a similar story: failure of teachers to recognize signs of learning differences (LD), lack of support or resources in most schools (public and private), and dropping self-esteem/confidence/overall happiness in the affected child.  The reality is that 1/5 kids have a learning issue and most of them are not identified.  Parents (and, sadly, many teachers) may be unaware of the signs of LD and how to procure diagnosis and treatment.  Early intervention is absolutely critical!

 

The previous stigma associated with LD is dissolving, as the flip side is so commonly observed: exceptional creativity and out-of-the-box thinking. As an example, Yale University has a Center to study LD and is highly supportive of recruiting and retaining these students.  Like many other “elite” private schools in LA, the parents of children at the Park Century School are some of the most recognized names in the world and dominate the entertainment, financial, political, and medical fields.  They are also unapologetic advocates for children with LD.  Although it was a nerve-wracking journey to navigate through, I can honestly say there is nothing about my daughter that I would change, and I am confident that her future is unlimited!

Isla Garraway, MD-PhD is an Assistant Professor of Urology at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA and mother of three children, ages 9, 6, and 3.  She is President-Elect of the Park Century School Parent’s Association and also has a child at the Mirman School.  
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Christina Simon: Los Angeles, California, United States I'm the mom of a daughter (12th grade) and a son (9th grade) who attend Viewpoint School in Calabasas. I live in Coldwater Canyon with my family and a rescue pit bull, Piper. Contact me at csimon2007@gmail.com

5 thoughts to “Guest Blogger Isla: What Do You Do When Your "Perfect" Child Has Difficulty Achieving In School?”

  1. This was such a fascinating post. It must be so hard when you know your child is bright and creative, but doesn't seem to be showing it at school. Another example of proof that we parents have to be our children's strongest advocates. Thanks to Isla for sharing this story!
    – Gina

  2. I commend you for recognizing your daughter's true potential and enrolling her in a school that fits her needs. I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision, but it sounds like it was the right one for her.

  3. Every parent and child should learn the skills and the law necessary to become an effective education advocate for self or others.

    Isla's story illustrates the need for every parent to commit making certain every child learns as expected.

    This means looking at report cards, teacher notes, test scores, and comparing progress over time as well as progress compared with students of similar age/grade level.

    But reviewing the educational record? –that's the part any good educational consultant can do. The hardest part is what only a parent can do:to say to a school in writing signed and dated: "My child is not demonstrating their abilities in class and I believe it is a result of a possible learning disability. I would like to have him/her evaluated because she is having trouble in (reading, math, spelling, writing, etc).

    Parents are often the first ones who will notice something 'off' in their children. They will typically think to themselves, 'hmmmm'…? and file the thought away for later. I have seen it happen. It's best for each child to have early intervention as Isla's experience with her daughter points out so clearly, so a parent should be taught to trust their intuition and allow it to speak to the school in a signed and dated writing to get the ball rolling.

    Child Find is great for kids when done properly, as Isla discovered just in time.

  4. I've watched so many of my friends and acquaintances struggle with learning disability issues with their kids. First, the parents don't want to recognize it, then they have to convince teachers and administrations to test for it. The fact is, not everyone learns the same way, and there's no reason to be penalized for it. It's great hearing about a school like Park Century.

  5. As we learn more about the science of the brain, it's becoming increasingly apparent that EVERYONE has an individual learning style. There is NO WAY for the classroom to work for all kinds of learners. BRAVO for recognizing this and getting your child the resources needed to reach her potential

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