Guest Blogger Susanna: The Los Angeles Private School Mom’s Alphabet (yes, it’s snarky!)


Jackson 5


The Los Angeles Private School Mom’s Alphabet (we’re not totally exempt…only for the most obnoxious stuff)


A is for ass-kissing for admissions

B is for buying your way in

C is for carb-free

D is for donations

E is for Einstein- every parent has one

F is for frenemies

G is for gardening- organic and by a professional gardener

H is for hidden costs

I is for injectables

J is for juicing

K is for karma- it’s going to be a bitch

L is for luxury items needed for the auction

M is for middle school hysteria

N is for never ending donations

O is OMG. Enough with the drama already!

P is personal everything: trainer, chef, assistant

Q is for quack doctors to make you look younger

R is for running every committee

S is for social climbing

T is for two-faced- best watch your back outside of committee meetings!

U is for the underserved students we raise money for once a year

V is for vaccination controversies

W is for world travel on every vacation and long weekend

X is for the number raised with the annual fundraiser- no one knows the amount

Y is for yoga pants

Z is for the zen you achieve when you realize elementary school won’t last forever.


Susanna Morgan’s attend a Los Angeles private elementary school. Susanna’s definitely not June Cleaver. A parenting non-expert and mom of two boys, she returned her pearls to her ex-husband’s family as part of their divorce. And now she’s reclaiming the life she wants. The pearls are off…